By Vince Chiles

The Sandwich Generation needs a break room. The demands on the sandwich generation are great, that’s why it is so important to take routine breaks into to feel rejuvenated and recharged. A break room is a metaphor for developing a daily routine of self-care that involves deliberate relaxation to unwind and unload the stress related to care giving.

There are three elements that are needed to design a break room. First, you need to have an established routine to take a break, next you need some break rules, and finally you need to give yourself a break. When you apply these three elements to your break room, you’ll discover how simple and easily it is to recharge yourself from the demands of care giving.

Your break room requires a daily routine. Just like a lunch room at work there is a specific time and purpose for use of this room. You need to establish a daily time and location to take your break, and keep yourself to this routine. Pick a time and location that you think will be easy for you to use. Examples would be to watch a pre-record TV show, to walk the dog when your spouse is home to help out, or enjoying a hot cup of tea on your recliner. You may want to watch you show before bed, walk the dog after dinner, or have a hot cup of tea at two in the afternoon. The importance is to pick a break activity, location, and time to go to the break room and stick with this routine day in and day out.

It’s good to establish some break room rules, even if you don’t have an actual room. Announce to your family from 10-11 at night is your time to watch your favorite soap, and you want no interruptions. You may need to have a special song or music that marks the beginning and end of break time. Some people design a special corner where they have pictures, or scented candles that remind them break time is a time to reflect and relax. Whatever you decide make sure to communicate the rules to others, and to honor them yourself.

Finally, it’s important to give yourself a break. There are so many reasons why not to take a break, from cleaning, to doctor’s appointments, to paying the bills that care givers often feel guilty taking five minutes to relax. You give so much to others, taking a break is a way to give back to yourself. Why is this important? Well, if you don’t you run the risk of resenting the very people you want to help - you loved ones. Remember, you need to survive others are relying on you so give yourself a break.

Remember to routinely take a break, to have pre-established rules for break room behavior, and to give your self a break each day, and you’ll be better able to face the challenges of care giving. The sandwich generation is under so many demands and pressures, that care givers need a release valve. Using a break room is a strategy that can relieve the stress you feel.

Vince Chiles, LCSW is the author of a self-published book Happiness in Five Minutes a Day which is scheduled to be released to the public 3/26/08. Information about Vince and his book can be obtained by going to http://www.happinessinfive.com

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